Friday, June 10, 2011

The new celebrities. Or epic fail.

"What's the matter with you, grumpy pants?" Spleenal's wife asked.
"Humm, well I wanted to do a comic strip on the 1997 Asian financial crisis..."

"Sounds hilarious." She stopped short mentioning how current the idea was.
"It was going to be like my seminal work on the cause of the the Iraq war!" Spleenal barked back. "But I can't now because Ryan Giggs had sex with Imogen Thomas!"
"Eh?" Spleenal's wife knew from experience that she was going to regret asking but couldn't help it. "How?"

"Right, well, back in 97 Thailand had this massive building boom/bubble thing that was fed by "hot money" from western investment banks, they built office blocks all over the place but no-one moved in so the whole thing crashed taking Malaysia, South Korea, Indonesia and a few other places with it." Spleenal drew breath then continued his monologue... "Bloody crazy banks again making high risk loans going mental treating the economy like a roulette table!!!"

"So all these construction companies and other industries are so screwed The IMF wade in to stop "financial contagion" crashing western economies."
"IMF? What? Tom Cruise and Ving Rhames, and that, sorted it all out did they?" Asked Spleenal's wife.
"Naw, not the impossible missions force. The IMF is the international monetary fund, something we all pay into. They Bailed out the Asian economies, but all the money just went to pay off the Western banks!"
"It was another Bailout!!! No hold on our bailout was the "another bailout". This was the first one! They went mental 10 years ago screwed it all up then got bailed out! There was one degree of separation but they still got the money back!"

"How does this relate to Ryan Giggs then?" Spleenal's wife was bored now.
"Well I'm not sure of my facts! I've had a good rake around the net and I can find plenty of articles saying it was western money, but nothing names names, I wanna know if it was the same bosses then and now was it the same banks or not or what!?! I don't know!"
"But I know Giggs was screwin' around! Oh yes I know that! I keep on getting told that don't I. Time and again, That a footballer had sex with a reality TV star! Big deal! I thought all footballers had sex with reality TV stars. How's that news? It's not courageous, crusading, injunction busting, truth seeking journalism it's bullshit!"

"It's all crap! Celebrities aren't news! News is who fucked up my economy? Did they do it before? What's their track record? are they still in charge? Maybe, maybe not, I dunno! I want a change. I want the new celebrities! Bankers and politicians. I wanna see their cars their houses. Shots taken with telescopic lenses of them on their yachts. Who are their mistresses? If you're gonna screw over millions for billions the least we can have is an up skirt shot of your wife getting out of your limo!"

Over 1000 people died in riots following the collapse of Indonesia's economy.
Half of Tory funds comes from "bankers"
That last link about Tory money is telling. Gordon Brown bailed out the banks, so they're thinking "Jesus! We really owe that guy, he saved our asses... we'd better get rid of him!"

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some sort of artist or something. with problems and issues. I draw stuff
All cartoons and original writing ©Nigel Auchterlounie 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012