Thursday, March 27, 2008

World B

The God fish

So what have you been told?
Good. What have you observed?
Erm, well apart from all the security, and the way we seem to be miles from anywhere. Every one's female. Even the ones with the guns.

Yes men can't be here.

Six months ago somewhere in the north sea an oil barge found something rather odd. A diver surfaced with a strange fish that caught his eye.
Sorry, what's an "oil barge?"
It's a boat that searches the sea floor for oil. It stays out in the sea all the time, crew and supplies are brought to it by helicopters, those big sea king things that the coast guard uses.
Anyway this diver, a man called Carl Barus, brought the fish on board saying it was an angel.
An Angel?
Yes he was hallucinating. This was a little outside the expertise of the on board medic. So he called shore for an evac. While he was on the radio to the coast guard he said that the fish had "grown quickly", and described it as being like nothing he had ever seen before. There was a short silence, and the medic then said over the radio that Barus was wrong, that it was not an Angel. It was God.
There is a rare form of Frontal lobe epilepsy in which
sufferers can experience religious visions. We know very little about the workings of the frontal lobes, and it's only when something goes wrong with them that get clues as to what they do. Atheists think that many of us believe in a God because of this area of the brain, that has been highlighted by rare epileptics. True believers argue that this area of the brain, that is unique in humans, is there for us to talk to God. A telephone in our heads if you will.
Anyway the coast guard went out to the barge to pick up Barus and the medic. but by the time They got there a small holy war had broken out on board. Many believed the fish to be God, some thought it was Jesus, or an Angel.
Others thought it was Allah and two believed it to be the Buddha.

Is this real?
Oh yes. A lot of people died out there. They used flair guns, wielding torches, fire axes, hammers anything they could get their hands on. For some reason Those who saw one thing found it unacceptable that others may see something different.
So why is everyone here female?
Only men are affected. It seems that the creature has telepathic abilities. It maybe the way it communicates with others of it's kind. Male and female brains are different. Thankfully different enough so that women can't "hear" it.
I do feel something though
Yes a lot of us get a sort of vibrating, buzzing sensation in our heads. Like the radio's not tuned in or something.
Wait. This thing, whatever it is, is telling everyone it's god?
No it's an alien, whatever it's saying it's saying in a alien language, but the only thing that can hear it is the part of the brain in men that deals with religion, and that's over riding any underlying message. It could be saying "I'm hungry." or "Take me to your leader." or "Put me back in the water." all men see however is the face of their God.

Either that, or it's insane and really does think it's God.
I hadn't thought of that.
Where do you think it came from?
It's alien. That's all we know. It has a triple helix. They may have been down there for weeks or they may have been down there for a million years we still don't know.
Yes Barus did say that he saw thousands down there.

Click for part two


Anonymous said...

i really enjoyed this. i haven't even bothered laying deeper meanings on it yet because the concept in and of itself is so interesting.
youre funny AND "deep" haha

Terry said...

Very intriguing, Spleenal.

Sam said...

Good stuff.

Very interesting.

More to come, I hope!

looney said...


Jonathan Harford said...

Very nice.

Miz K said...

More, please?

Jim said...

Curiouser and curiouser... ;)

A good read Spleenal; enjoyably bizarre. Can't wait for chapter two!

Anonymous said...

Hello I just entered before I have to leave to the airport, it's been very nice to meet you, if you want here is the site I told you about where I type some stuff and make good money (I work from home): here it is

spleenal said...

barb michelen what the hell are you going on about?

Priestess Of Nothing said...

Wow... just wow. This was awesome.

Thank you for adding just a bit of nifty weirdness to my day. :)

Taz said...

I enjoyed that, added a little surreal to my day. Like the little rants too. If you ever get the lesbian space thing off the ground I'd love to see it =D.

Rob Hopcott said...

Enjoyed your blog as it plunders deeper and deeper waters.

I always look forward to returning for a good read. You are truly a professional and I have placed a link to you from my

under 'Humor blogs I like to visit.'

Hope it helps ;-)

Anonymous said...

Good stuff Spleenal. Glad someone gave me your link.

And Barb is a classic spam comment. As your blog grows in readership, you'll get plenty more of it.


taawc said...

Dude, it feels like this came out from left field in context of the rest of your stuff, but it's awesome.

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