Saturday, December 1, 2007

New spleenal toy hits shops

The new look, three speed, talking Spleenal “toy” is proving to be an unexpected hit with the ladies.

Voiced by George Clooney
With phrases such as:-
“How was your day?”
“Have you done something with your hair?”
and “Put your feet up, I’ll cook dinner.”
On the first speed level.

Moving up to sayings such as:-
“More wine darling?”
“Let me put the fire on.”
and “Have you lost weight?”
on the medium speed setting.

And on the foundation crumbling speed level three one can enjoy phrases like:-
”I’ve wanted you all day”
“I wish you’d been my first.”
And “Are you sure you haven’t lost weight?”

Oh yes the new Spleenal “toy” version one is set to be a real hit with the ladies…

…And for those who like things a little less smooth, coming soon is the Spleenal total bastard talking dildo, which will shout things at you like:-
“Shut up bitch!”
“bend over slut!”
“You like that don’t you dirty whore!”
and “Leave me alone bitch, I’m off down the pub.”
With the vocal talents of Ray Liotta… No scratch that. Me, I’m gonna fuckin’ say it!

Still popular is the original talking butt plug voiced by Dan Castellaneta, the voice of TV’s Homer Simpson, which says “Hummm. Ass.”


butterfly said...


This one made my stomach hurt from laughing -- especially that butt-plug, he looks so blissfully stupid and hilarious! Rough patch at home, huh?

Maarten Rijs said...

yup definitly no men toys.

Tux said...

Do you want to live in Canada? I want you. I need you to find your purpose as much as anyone can find one. Got to go....

spleenal said...

Tux er, yes I wouldn't mind living in Cananda.
Although the cost of relocating me, my kids and wife might be a little beyond your means.

I neglected to thankyou before for going through the google sign up thing just to comment on one of my posts. Thanks.

spleenal said...

as for where in Canada?
I always liked the look of Calgary

Chick said...

Ass if butt plugs weren't scary you're making them talk??!!

Tux said...

Funny - I happen to be in Calgary. Ah the beautiful Rocky Mountains, the rolling foothills and the wide open spaces. We also have the Calgary Stampede in July which is basically a 10 day city wide party.
As far as money goes - I am barely a thousandaire so I could maybe afford to send a post card.

Hey when are we going to see the Spleenals created by others? I'm especially looking forward to Terry's.

BenefitScroungingScum said...


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